Thursday Dec 01, 2022

Why Didn’t They Tell Us?

“This inner teen operates from a place of fear. She’s just trying to protect you,” explains host Leslie Randolph. Leslie is a confidence coach for teenage girls and the teenage girl that lives inside each of us. We all have an inner teen that is trying to keep us safe from cringey emotions like rejection, embarrassment, failure, and humiliation. Our default brain is an insecure teenage girl who simply cannot differentiate between the fear of embarrassment and the fear of physical injury or death. To our inner teen, being rejected can be just as terrifying as falling off a cliff. We tend to think that this ingrained fear of failure and criticism will keep us safe, but Leslie explains that all it really does is keep us small and keep us from living the life of our dreams.

Your inner teen’s motivation is to keep you safe and keep you alive, she just can’t tell the difference between perceived dangers and actual dangers. In order to reclaim self-confidence and embrace self-love, you must get to the other side of those cringey emotions that your inner teen is trying so hard to avoid. It feels uncomfortable to allow yourself to face those fears and risk rejection, embarrassment, and failure, but it is so worth the risk. The life you have always wanted for yourself lives on the other side of those feelings.

It can be daunting to face the longstanding fears held by our inner teens, but it is exactly what we need to do in order to become confident women with the lives that we have always wanted. By better understanding the motivations behind our inner teen, we can better cope with the fears and face them with wisdom, love, and grace. Tune into Why Didn’t They Tell Us with host Leslie Randolph to learn more about your inner teen and how to choose self-confidence.

Quotes:

• “I always wonder what my life would look like if I had known what I know now as a teen.” (2:55-3:03 | Leslie)

• “Your default brain is kind of like that insecure teenage girl.” (4:28-4:36 | Leslie)

• “This inner teen operates from a place of fear. She’s just trying to protect you.” (5:00-5:06 | Leslie)

• “You remember as a teen that first experience with rejection, embarrassment, humiliation, failure. Those are the feelings that your teen is trying to keep you safe from. The inner teen believes those emotions are just as bad as physical pain or death. Your inner teen is a primal creature. She just wants to keep you safe and keep you alive. She can’t discern between embarrassment and being attacked by a lion or differentiate between failure and falling off a cliff. She’s just going to protect you from all of the above.” (5:17-6:02 | Leslie)

• “I wish someone would’ve told me that my fear of failure wasn’t keeping me safe. It was keeping me small.” (6:50-6:57 | Leslie)

• “What I wish someone had told me was that there is so much on the other side of those emotions, those cringey emotions that your inner teen is trying to keep you away from. There is so much connection on the other side of rejection. There is so much pride when you are willing to feel embarrassed. There is so much love and acceptance when you are willing to put yourself out there and face your fear, but you’ll never know it and you’ll never experience it unless you are saying, ‘I am willing to take that risk.’” (11:07-11:59 | Leslie)

Why Didn’t They Tell Us?

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